A few weeks ago I decided I had enough. I had enough with working a 40 hour job, plus a 22 hour part time job and the additional 8 hours at the farmer’s market. Though I have appreciated the extra money, I am tired all the time. If you read me, you know I don’t like feeling tired.
I am a lucky person. I have jobs. Some folks in Michigan don’t have any. I also found great places to work with good people. Technically I am at the St@te job temporarily until I find that “Other” part-time job to supplement my part-time mental health job I have with insurance. Yeah, I know I’m a lucky bastard to have a part-time job with health insurance and beni’s. That’s why I can look for a second part time job that I want to do, not have-to-do...there is a difference. I also do not have to work a 40 hour a week job either…though technically I am working over 40 right now. Confused? Me too. I am not a fan of the 8-5pm workday. It eats a chunk out of life and inevitably I have to take time off of work to see the doctor or go to fun things. Having two 20 hour jobs gives me more flexibility….trust me.
A few weeks ago, I got a name plate at the temporary job. I’ve been here so long folks need to know who I am. Ugh. I like the peeps here, I am bored as hell with the stapling, so I decided it was time to call in a favor from the universe to “get the change” happening. I believe the prayer went something like this:
“I’ve been at the St@te since November. I have a name plate. They put me on the cleaning list! I needed out now”.
Wham, bam, and this is why I heart the universe, I think I may finally have a job that I want. I don’t know yet. I even wonder if it’s taboo to talk about this until I do know for sure, but whatever, I need something to post about. I appreciate the grace of knowing things can work out as long as we do our part in “the working it out process”. In my world, I see most things like this:
Me: Conviction, plan, resources, positive outlook after brooding.
Universe: Provides exactly what I "need" once I stop brooding.
Um that's need not want.
I don’t know if I have the job. But it feels like the right job, the one I have been waiting to get. It’s certainly in the direction I am looking for, which is social advocacy at the community level working with lower income communities. It’d be hard work, but I learned a long time ago that the universe gave me the exact skills I needed to deal with hard. Trust me on this.
My patience is worn though. I really want this job. I think I’d be disappointed if I didn’t get it. More so, I think I might explode from another few months of stapling.
Whatever. Thank you universe for always giving me what I need…now please send me the right kind of gyrl (someone i'd actually date) and not women who tell me things like "I'm going to F$%K you so good, you’ll think I’m g-d.” Seriously, I prefer that kind of language after we…I don’t know go out to dinner not the first SECOND I MEET YOU! I deserve better then this, so, Universe, consider this one in writing.